A few weeks ago, I was looking after a woman having her third baby, she had 2 boys already and they were thrilled to be having a very much wanted girl. As a midwife and mother of 2 I often get asked the same questions from my colleagues and women ‘Are you going to have a third?’ or ‘Are you going to try for the boy?’
I’m used to it now, I’m getting pretty good with my response depending on my mood, I smile and say ‘Well yes my husband wants a boy but the likelihood is it will be another girl and we can’t just have another child to have a certain sex can we so um (now I’m bluffing) we’re undecided but I’ll let you know when we’re trying’ (that usually shuts them up). I also have the great excuse that we live in a tiny 2 bed cottage in London and I know a baby could sleep in a draw/washing basket where ever but I already feel guilty that my eldest has to share with her loud destructive little sister.
Both my husband and I are one of 3, we said all along we would love to have 3 that’s until we had 2 children and the reality hit us at bath and bed time, who would get the third child ready? With 2 there’s enough hands to manage it all (just), with 3 one child always gets left out, queue the phrase typical middle child syndrome, apologies to my sister.
So in my head I’m done, no more children I’m grateful for what we have, 2 beautiful healthy girls and yes a boy would be lovely or even another girl but why when I did my annual bank holiday Monday loft sort out was I overwhelmed with the vast amounts of baby stuff all organised in labelled bags? As I tried to rationalise giving it all to charity or selling it on EBay my empty uterus wept as I sniffed the tiny white baby grows remembering those precious first few weeks with my new born baby……………..
Yup so I’m
100% 97% 92% – I’m almost decided on no more babies (at least for today). Yes – I’m completely happy with what I have and so I should be. I’ll enjoy these two great small people I have in my life, until my uterus starts weeping again and the crying is too loud to ignore.